NeverTrump Lies, Part Two: ‘You can’t be a Christian and vote for Trump!’

Wow. I hate this one. I really do. Christians, it’s time for some tough love.

MYTH: Donald Trump is an ‘yuge’ sinner who has not been saved. Because of his marital record, his ownership of casinos, and his un-Christlike personality, he is morally, temperamentally, and spiritually unfit to be President of the United States. Christians who support him are either sadly deluded, have no standards of conduct, or are Christians in name only. Even if Trump is less immoral than Hillary, he is still evil; and voting for the ‘lesser of two evils’ is in and of itself evil. True Christian conservatives should dump Trump at the Convention for someone who adequately represents our values; and if this fails, should vote for neither Trump nor Hillary in the general election, but instead pray to God and hope for the best.

FACT: Yes, I can be a Christian and still vote for Donald Trump. I am not voting for a Pope; Trump is not my pastor or priest. He will protect me and all Americans against illegal immigrants, Muslim migrants, and terrorists who do NOT share our Christian values and never will. No, the aforementioned people are not ripe for receiving the Word. They want to kill you and destroy our society.

“But he brags all the time and is vulgar!”

Breaking news: Trump was a reality TV star and a very competitive businessman. Yes, I think he has the right to brag. Besides, when he does, it’s all in good fun. People think it’s hilarious. No, that is not a sin. If Trump were actually bragging in a cruel way, don’t you think the crowds at his rallies would have gone down by now? 

Also, Jesus Himself called people names and did shocking things. Herod was a “fox”; the Pharisees were a “brood of vipers”; St. Peter was “Satan.” Jesus overturned the money tables in the Temple and drew out the moneychangers with whips. He said that to have eternal life, you had to eat his flesh and drink his blood. (“But that’s cannibalism!”) And yes, I did just compare Trump to Christ Himself because all other arguments seem to fail!

Yes, Trump can be actually vulgar – not just anti-PC – and he has said things I strongly disapprove of. However, he has done more than anyone else to break the stranglehold of political correctness over the past year. It’s a package deal: We must take the bitter with the sweet – but so far, the sweet has definitely won.

“But he owned casinos which preyed on the poor! And he’s mean to women and minorities!”

OK, so I guess we’re not allowed to go to Indian-run casinos, then. Shut them down! They’ll have to find some other way to finance their reservations, which suffer from epic levels of poverty and despair!

No, really: last I checked, Atlantic City was NOT the playground of the ‘other half.’ Everyone going into a casino knows the rules. Deal with it.

And as for ‘women and minorities,’ big bad misogynist Trump is doing quite well with them, thank you very much.

“But he’s been divorced three times!”

Yes, and you probably have been, too. The Church has no right to criticize Trump’s divorces, considering it has brazenly tolerated divorces for far too long in American society. In fact, Trump did better than most regular churchgoers, managing to keep up friendly relationships with his previous two wives, and raising a stable and beautiful family to boot.

“But he lies!”

Really? Name one lie. If you can, you’ve probably been reading too much of the WaPo and New York Times, which have a mandate to destroy him.

Yes, just like yourself, Trump has exaggerated the truth sometimes. But so does every other politician – and Trump isn’t even a career politician! So if he does lie, he can be relied on do so to a far lesser extent than his rivals!

Unlike NeverTrump, I have real difficulty believing that Trump is the Antichrist. So do the American voters. I think we can be relied upon to know an evil liar when we see one.

“Trump is not good. Hillary is not good. Supporting evil in any form is evil.”

Is Trump evil? See above. Also (I hate to drag Hitler into this, but you leave me no choice), I don’t see you complaining that we supported Stalin’s Russia over Hitler’s Germany in World War II. Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a German pastor of the anti-Nazi Resistance, was involved in a plot to kill Hitler. That is attempted murder, and therefore evil – but I don’t see any complaints about that, either.

“I still don’t like him. I’m writing in Jesus.”

Jesus is not your boyfriend, Jesus is not your best friend, and Jesus is not your President. You have two choices – and you know it. White, upper-middle class Christians who hate Trump and have time on their hands to worry about whether or not he’s sufficiently ‘saved’ are doing themselves a grave disservice. Stop passing judgement on your fellow Christians; stop being Pharisees. Get your heads out of the sand, and vote Trump!

Part Three coming soon…

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